Warning: I am about to reveal how disgusting I am in the privacy of my home.

This morning, after taking a few swigs of my morning diet Pepsi, I let out a well-rendered belch. DH laughed and said, "Woman, you are disgusting." I smiled and said, "Yes, well, I try. But look at it this way: if I stopped burping in front of you, A-you’d wonder what was wrong with me, B-you’d miss it, and C-where would the fun be?"

Sweet Girl piped up with, "Lagoon is where fun is!"

…but thankfully not too many more times. Munchkin’s baseball season is about over - for us, anyway. The team has games scheduled well into June, with two tournaments at the end of the month, but with Munchkin leaving in a week, I’m not worrying about those! His team has done well - I think they’re 9-4 now.

Tonight we played a much smaller neighboring town, and beat them soundly - it was actually almost embarrassing. 25-5. The opposing team scored all 5 of their runs in the first inning. It was a looonnnngggg game, let me tell you! LOL On Saturday we drove an hour to play a double header, and we won both of those games, too - 11-3 and 6-2. Saturday was also a very looonnnggg day - out of the house by 8 a.m., drive an hour, an hour of warmups, two hours of baseball, half an hour for lunch, another half hour of warmups, two more hours of baseball, another hour drive home. Ugh.

But we did see a funny thing while we were driving around at lunch time, trying to decide where to eat. After driving down most of the main strip and realizing there probably weren’t any more restaurants that direction, we pulled in to a parking lot to turn around - and noticed two men washing a large, live pig in the bed of a small pickup.  

The pickup was parked next to one of those traveling taco vans.

Munchkin and I looked at each other, and at nearly the same time, said, "Don’t wanna ask, don’t wanna know!"

So, last Saturday (yes, last Saturday - the 19th - it’s been another busy week, lol) we attended a local parade. Every May, the local Exchange Club hosts "Parade America," a cool patriotic parade that exists solely for the purpose of letting us show our patriotism. This year’s theme - imagine this - was "It’s A Grand Old Flag." Of course, Little Man was quite excited, as enamored he is with flags. Some of my favorite moments…

My nephew, LB, sported a kewl flag on his cheek. Doesn’t my sister rock?

Everyone waiting for the first flag to come by

Munchkin was on the other side of me, and didn’t make it in the first pic… but look! He’s smiling! A rare sight to capture on film (or whatever) these days. Look at that dimple…. sigh.

Everybody thought this was pretty durn cool.

The Boy Scouts handed out these little plastic flags to everyone. I promptly stuck mine in the pocket of Sweet Girl’s hat. It looked cute, but it drove her nuts… but I managed to get a photo just before she took it off.

One of the cutest things was this little boy, who went along with the fire truck, tossing candy out of the water bucket on his bike. He was in the paper the next day - he’s a fireman’s son. Sweet, eh?

"Every heart beats true, ‘neath the red, white and blue."

I just really liked this guy’s flag. It’s not a great pic, but instead of the field of stars, it’s a peace sign.

Old flag with circle of 13 stars. We’ve come a long way, baby.

The local sugar company always passes out 5-lb bags of sugar. We didn’t get one this year (boo!) but I still loved their sign. Sugar - 15 calories per teaspoon of PURE ENERGY! Yup, I don’t care how many ’studies’ come out saying that sugar consumption has no connection to children’s hyperactivity levels… I believe the sugar company’s advertisement! LOL

Sweet Girl and Little Man loved these horses - "they’re my size, Mom!"

I have no idea what this float was actually FOR. Contrary to the placement of the photos here, it wasn’t immediately following the mini ponies above. Anyway… even though we didn’t know whose float this was, it won my vote of most hilarious float. I laughed the entire time it passed. In the front was a bunch of patriotically-dressed girls (is patriotically a word?) enthusiastically waving to the crowd. At the back of the float, flanked by "God Bless America" and "Personal Ponies" signs, was a singing Elvis impersonator, singing "I Can’t Help Falling in Love with You."

Nice jumpsuit, dude.

And the best part… across the back of the float was a sign for a local pizza buffet place. It’s been nearly a week, and I’m still trying to figure out how these all went together.

Little Man didn’t seem as impressed with Elvis as the rest of us.

This was just a cool old car. I took a pic of it because I thought Dad would like it. Then I cried a little.

Quiz: if you live in a small town, how can you tell the parade’s over? Answer: This is following all the cool old cars.

 

Ways in which this Monday has sucked and probably will continue to suck:

- woke up at 7:51. First bell rings at Sweet Girl’s school at 7:55.

- Kiddo and Munchkin were still asleep at 7:51. Their bus comes at 7:58.

- it’s garbage day and I didn’t have the garbage gathered up yet.

- after dropping off Kiddo at school, I whacked the heck out of my knee on the dashboard as I was getting in the driver’s seat. Kiddo drove to school and forgot to scoot the seat back before he got out.

- when it was time to pick Sweet Girl up from school, I realized that a) Little Man had taken off his pants and tossed them in the laundry room; b) he had a nasty stinky diaper and c) the wet wipes had disappeared. Of course, I realized the wet wipes were gone after I’d taken the nasty diaper off and couldn’t put Little Man’s butt down because it was covered in poo.

- due to the diaper incident, I was late picking Sweet Girl up from school.

- while on the treadmill I dropped my water bottle. Well, at least this time I didn’t fall off the treadmill, like I did last Friday.

- a lunch date was made with my sister to celebrate her birthday. Within five minutes the lunch date was cancelled.

- I need to go drop off Sweet Girl and Little Man at my mom’s, then pick up Munchkin from school and take both of us for an eye exam.

- I still need to go grocery shopping.

- but before I do anything I need to go shower, but I’m waiting for the strength to come back in my legs from running on the treadmill. (yeah, I’m a loser. lol)

- tonight Kiddo has a choir concert at the high school at 6:30. Munchkin has a baseball game at the middle school at 6:30.

- I really hate Mondays.

Gotta go.

Little Man, you’re officially two and a half years old now - in the midst of the terrible twos, working toward the terrific threes. Yes, you’re two… and you’re good at it. But for every obnoxious moment, there are three or four smiling moments. So for each of the 30 months you’ve made me smile, I’ve listed 30 Things I Want To Always Remember About Little Man’s Twos.

1. Your strange fascination with the mole near my left elbow. Ever since you realized it was there - about two years ago, I think - it has been a focus multiple times a day. Whether it’s a random poke (just to make sure it’s still there?) or how you rub it as you fall asleep, or when you look for it and touch it when you’re sad, your obsession never fails to crack me up.

2. The way you say "Oh, bum-muh!" when you drop a toy.

3. Your willingness to come give me a hug upon request.

4. The cute, sad little way you say, "Oh-tay, I wee-ill," when I tell you to pick up your toys, or other instructions.

5. Your gorgeous brown eyes, and the way you use them.

6. Your obsession with all things wheeled - especially cars, ESPECIALLY the movie Cars.

7. The way you say "Lighting Keen!"

8. The way you grab Sweet Girl’s hand and lead her around, saying, "Tum on, [Sweet Girl], tum here! I sow you!"

9. The way you ask for some ‘sock mook‘ in the ‘baloooo tup’.

10. Your new interest in having the "It’s Potty Time!" book read to you over and over.

11. How, after reading that book, I say, "You want to go potty in the toilet like a big boy?" and you say, "No, dat’s siwwy!"

12. When we’re reading "It’s Potty Time!" and we get to the "when I’m done, I wipe my bottom with toilet paper" line and you yell, "TOY-LUT PAY-PAH! YAAAY!"

13. If someone looks sad & starts to cry, even if they’re faking it, you run over and give them a big hug, while saying, “Big hug!” and then you ask, “Dere. All bettuh? No moh cwy, tay?”

14. When you give me a hug and say, “Mom, we bess fwenns! Bess fwenns, oh-tay?”

15. As you watch Munchkin at any of his sporting events and yell, “Doe, Bubba! Doe! Doe, duys, doe!”

16. When Bubba’s team scores a point and you clap – then turn to me and instruct me, “Fwap, Mom. Fwap your hanns! Yay!”

17. Again, with the love of all things wheeled - how delighted you were to drive the cars at Lagoon.

18. When you ask for a bowl of cereal for breakfast, and no matter which kind I suggest, you reply with, “Yessss! Dat’s it! Dat’s my fave-witt!”

19. Similarly, when you ask for a cup of ‘sock mook’ and just about any cup gets the “yesss! Dat’s my fave-witt!” response.

20. When we’re counting objects, or naming colors, or going over shapes – and after I give an answer, you respond with, “Yes! Dat’s it! Dood job, Mom.”

21. As I change your diaper and you hold your legs up for me – and tell me, “I’m sape, Mom! I’m sape!” and I have to guess which shape you deem your legs to be. “I soh-koh, Mom!” or “I twi-aynnil, Mom!”

22. How much you love to cuddle.

23. How, even after I ask you repeatedly if you’d like some of your own food and you politely turn me down, you never fail to eat half of what’s on my plate.

24. How you come in the office and ask, “You zeckin you own email, Mom? I zeck my own email?”

25. How you love to get on the computer and open my email, proclaiming it to be yours.

26. Your odd love of Texas. (Any Texans, please don’t hold it against me. It’s just that we’ve never been to Texas and doubtfully ever will, and we know no one from Texas.) It’s a shape thing.

27. How you scream “Tek-uss” whenever you see anything having to do with Texas.

28. How you sing along to the radio. So what if it’s a beat late?

29. Your obsession with the song “Last Dollar” by Tim McGraw. It was cute the first thousand times you wanted to listen to it. Now that you know how to turn on the computer, open the media player, find the song and play it ad nauseum, it’s not so cute. But I do love how you sing “one, doo, tree, birdie sing!”

30. How you never fail to say “thank you” (ok, “fank oo”) when appropriate. You do have impeccable manners for a two-year-old.